Jerry-Orest
You know, when we first met it was like any other relationship. We were happy without a care in the world. We would spend time with eachother  everyday playing, laughing, sharing memories, but I have to be honest with you Blizzard, it feels like we’ve grown apart.

Blizzard, I have to say that this relationship has turned sour. What was once hours of fun has turned to frustration and abuse. How could you do this to me Blizzard? I just wanted to play Starcraft, but you won’t let me. You lead me on and then shut me down with unfounded lag. This abuse has to stop, I do not have high latency and neither do my friends. I used to come back to you whenever I would leave, thinking that you’ve changed but everytime it’s the same thing.

I don’t know how else to say this Blizzard, other than I won’t be seeing you again, you’ve led me on and have abused me for too long and I’ve had enough, we’re over. I don’t want to see you again until you change into Starcraft 2.0

Goodbye Blizzard.

Cheers, Jerry-Orest

Jerry-Orest

There, you’re dead. Happy? I am, you’re another zombie to kill. If you see yourself in this kind of situation as pictured above, chances are that either you and your group of fellow survivors have no idea what they’re doing, or there has been a collapse in reason and order amongst yourselves resulting in rash and disastrous decision making. The only bigger threat to the survival of humanity than zombies are ourselves.

Aside from constant vigilance for signs of zombie outbreaks and preparing my surroundings to best aid me in destroying them, I oft contemplate of where to go and who to look for. It’s difficult to decide which is more important because location is essential to waiting out a zombie outbreak until hopefully military assistance becomes available. On the other hand who you choose to group yourself with will ultimately decide whether your group has the ability to wait the outbreak out. A balance is needed because you don’t want a good location with a bunch of yahoos who will get you killed anyway, or a group of reasonable people with the competance to kill zombies and be sitting on the streets downtown.

DO NOT go to your local mall unless there is a guns and ammo store, go there, get supplies, get out. Rooftops are a good place to bunker down since you will be high up from the zombies and if there are any other survivors/assistance you can contact them.

The danger of zombies are not they’re speed, strength, or intelligence, its they’re numbers and they’re ability to lull us into thinking we’re safe.

If you need be I’ll be downtown where the fun is.
Cheers,
Jerry-Orest

Jerry-Orest

Hello, I think it’s time we’ve had this talk. Sit down, pull up a chair, in that order. If at any time you feel the need to jam the chair onto your door knob then please feel free to do so.

Now, I know that many of you may be thinking that I’m just talking out of my ass on this subject, and I will tell you this, I would like to learn how to speak out of my ass so that I can talk to you twice at the same time about this.

The Zombie Threat:

The zombie threat is not one to be taken lightly. Although they are slow and clumsy creatures, en mass they are a danger which is more prevalent than polar bears. And no, zombies cannot run, that is a common misconception among today’s culture. You should be so grateful that they cannot run, I know I am. The danger of zombie lies not within what they are capable of doing physically, but rather the psychological effect they afflict.

A. They were people, could be people you knew

B. There’s alot of them

Everybody knows that zombies can ONLY be killed by inflicting fatal trauma to the brain. Do not forget this. What we have to consider now is what are the most effective and practical ways of inflicting this trauma. Obviously guns, or rather the bullets in them are extremely effective in achieving our objective, however not all of us have these. What are some things you may have around the home or neighbourhood that you can use?

A baseball bat, a golf club, a garbage can, broomstick, boomstick, beer bottle, vodka bottle, whiskey bottle, colt .45 bottle, least liked family members, crowbar, hockey sticks.

These are but a few of items which can be found at the average household. Now I know it may be tempting to take a blade edged weapon but I would highly  advise not to do so unless under most dire circumstances, simple reason being that a bladed weapon will get stuck in the undead flesh and you won’t be able to recover it.

Onwards towards zombie plague fashion. The key to zombie invasion apparel is to wear clothing which will protect you from unwanted zombie bites and allow you the flexibility you need to effectively evade and attack your zombie overlords. Try wearing alot of leather, everyone’s dead anyway so no one is going to judge you.

I hope this brief introduction and tutorial to Zombie awareness has shed some light onto the scenario for you. Enjoy yourselves, have a pint of Guiness. Next time I’ll talk about where to go in the event of a zombie epidemic and the seriousness of the human condition.

Cheers, Jerry-Orest

Jerry-Orest
The singularity, whether it is a period of very fast technological advancement, or the moment that machines become a entity which has surpassed our own, all I’m interested in is the bottom line of: How can I benefit from this?
Okay, possibility one: We advance technologically to the point where we will live for two hundred years longer than we do now due to nano technology constantly repairing any damaged cells elongating our lives. Big deal. Really, I’ve been around for twenty years and I’m already bored, the last thing I need is a longer life span. Give me something I can actually use with this techno leap. With nano tech, I want to have the gaming experience at the level where I can touch my eye and I will be inside the gaming world and the graphics will be atleast GeForce 10000000.
Two: Machines pwn us. That’s your first mistake, trying to fight back. We might as well accept it now that we can’t punch metal to the effect of the result we want. I have punched many metal materials and unless these things are made of lead then we are screwed. I’ve seen Terminater and the Matrix, I know what’s going to happen. So I don’t know about you, but I plan on not getting spanked by bots- Idea, use battlebots to battle bots- back on track, my plan? Befriend them. How do you think I can befriend machines? Show them that I am one of them, from the future. An organic highly evolved machine which has surpassed metal and circuits. I intend to do this by showing them various doctored photos of me with robots in mutually enjoyable scenarios.

Wishing you the best in the coming singularity.

Me and the Robinson family robot hugging for the camera

Oh just me and IG-88 playing hide and go seek. Did he find me? I’ll never tell

uh oh! Is that me and the Borg sneaking a myspace profile pic? Fun times!

Jerry-Orest

Same old car, same old problems.

Really, just when I thought that this car was finally done with, its flame distinguished, buried for good, it keeps crawling back from the grave like Sylvester Stallone’s acting career ( I still havn’t forgotten about Rambo old man!). Really, this car was nice and everything when I first got it, heck yes the 1991 Nissan Sentra was nothing short of badass machinery at its most badassness. After a year of repairs now though and its sucking more money out of me than a classy women of money for hangoutz exchanges. The car truly is the bat flyin’ out of hell. It’s the Lo Pan of old import automobiles.

Well to be honest I wish it had Lo Pan’s powers because quite frankly that we be cool like something fierce. This car and I go way back, back since before I could remember. It’s been a great three years.

I remember when I first got it, how I made a dent to the door on the first day, oh haha what good memories, it was so cute how I used to care if the car got damaged. I remember nearly dying several times, I’m still not sure if the car was the reason I am still alive, or it was trying to kill me? That’s just silly though..

Nonetheless I am back to my infinity times awesome job delivering Chinese food. It’s going to be nice to have money again and not attacking mice in my room over who gets the last piece of the carpet for supper. Really, thank Skywalker that as soon as I got my car back, just in time the gas price when up ten cents per litre. PHEW, that was a close one I’ll tell you what.

I have to go to work now,
Cheers everyone from me and the Weinerbeaster 1.2

 

 Lost Mind Rape - The Economist [28:52m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Sayid OMFG Sayid!

Jerry-Orest

Hello, under my less than quetionably lucid self I seemed to have apparently made a blog post before the formal introduction.

Well, ah, um, er…ah..hey?

This is Jerry-Orest Poliszczuk, imthinking, robot, the beard.

My first gaming experiences (from what I can recall) was in junior kindergarden when I would play pong and pinball on what I will presume was an Atari, or maybe even a ColecoVision system. I knew from then on though, that even then when I pwned my dad that this is what I needed to do. Christ, I remember the first time I saw Starcraft when I was eight, it was the dawning of the age of aquarious.

I’m a PC gamer through n’ through, prefer my RTS but I’ve branched off into MMO’s like WOW and Guild Wars. I like it, you don’t? Okay.

I am a nerd, I did not choose this, it chose me, and all I can do is continue that radicalness in all that is pure and beautiful in this world, which ironically enough most nerdy things do not exist. That’s probably why it is radical. Rad.

Better Than Sex: Confessions of a Political Junkie - Hunter S. Thompson

Working Full Time - The Constantines

Jerry-Orest

Now will all things considered, I have to admit that leaving three essays to due within two days of each other to the day before they’re due is not the wisest of things a student can do. To be fair and to my credit, I just got the textbook to my essay due tomorrow from a friend who by chance or fate decided to drop out and sell me his book yesterday.

Two essays down and one to go tonight and right now I’m a car runnin’ on a tank of sand. I feel nothing short than lead in my veins. So,

A. Don’t leave your work to the last minute B. Don’t leave your work to the last minute

Barring that, I’ll have a two week break from school so I hold on to that as I contemplate my place in the universe whilst my sanity comes to question from the lack of sleep. However recently I had the joy and pleasure of watching the cinematic marvel none other than the latest Rambo. Safe to say comparable to Plato’s Republic? Alright, so the dialogue is forced and fairly terrible and the acting is questionable, the image of the 62 year old Sylvester Stallone running around brutally killing soldiers more than half his age pretty much made it all up for me. Would I recommend this movie? No, no I will not, unless you enjoy many explosions and the many, many, many (many) scenes of people being blown apart. Now I realize that Mr. Stallone was attempting to convey the situation in Burma, that the reality of life there is terrible and the world should be better informed of this, but really, should this really be presented in a movie as Rambo?

Right, well I continue on with , my work. I really want to make an attempt to end each blog with songs, books, or movies that I think people should try and give a look at.

Civil Twilight- The Weakerthans

Curve of the Earth- Attack in Black